Wingnut News for Friday.

Headlines: Missing bible, missing brain, Planet Bizarro BillO, comfort Gitmo detainees, clown journalists on the black issues, and much wingnut news.

Glenn Beck freaks out about the missing Bible at Obama’s do-over swearing in.
Yesterday on his new Fox News show, Glenn Beck panicked about the re-do oath of office President Obama took last night, because Obama did not place his hand on a Bible. “I checked. We have never had a president sworn into office without a Bible,” he intoned dramatically

Larry King: ‘Black is in.’
Wednesday night on CNN, Larry King was talking to radio host Tavis Smiley and journalist Bob Woodward about President Obama and issues of race. “Black is in,” concluded King. From their exchange:

KING: Bob, my — in that regard, my younger son Cannon, he is eight. And he now says that he would like to be black. I’m not kidding. He said there’s a lot of advantages. Black is in. Is this a turning of the tide?

Boehner’s Alternate Reality: Gitmo Detainees Get ‘More Comforts Than A Lot Of Americans Get’

Earlier yesterday, President Obama signed an executive order directing the closure of the U.S. military prison at Gitmo. Asked during a news conference for his reaction to the order, House Minority Leader John Boehner made it clear that he wasn’t even sure why anyone would want to close the prison in the first place. After all, he explained, the detainees there get “more comforts than a lot of Americans get”:

QUESTION: A lot of members of Congress on both sides of the aisle say that Guantanamo Bay has just given the United States a black eye on the world stage. Isn’t that part of the problem, too? […]

BOEHNER: I don’t know that there’s a terrorist treated better anywhere in the world than what has happened at Guantanamo. It is — we have spent hundreds of millions of dollars to build a facility that has more comforts than a lot of Americans get.

Limbaugh Claims He’s Being Told ‘To Bend Over, Grab The Ankles’ Because Obama’s ‘Father Was Black’
Wednesday night on Fox News, host Sean Hannity sat down with right-wing radio host Rush Limbaugh to discuss Limbaugh’s “general thoughts” of President Obama and his new administration. Limbaugh seemed agitated at the fact that “a lot of people right now just — they’re absorbed in the historical nature of this, first black president and so forth.” “That is wonderful. That’s great,” Limbaugh said. “But I got over that months ago after he won the election.”

Limbaugh kept going with the racial theme throughout much of the interview.

“He’s not black…he’s a human being,” he said. And while he claimed that the “drive-by media” only “care that he’s black,” Limbaugh added, “The fact that he’s African-American, his father was black, to me it’s irrelevant.” But

Limbaugh later revealed what seems to be the true nature of his feelings on Obama’s race:

LIMBAUGH: We are being told that we have to hope he succeeds, that we have to bend over, grab the ankles, bend over forward, backward, whichever, because his father was black, because this is the first black president.

BillO: 'This is not the time for ideology' -- so we must destroy the evil socialists of the left

Bill O'Reilly's Talking Points Memo segment Wednesday night was a classic of blithe self-contradiction:

You may have noticed that "The Factor" has not nitpicked Barack Obama. We don't play the gotcha game because that doesn't do you any good. This is not a time for ideology. This is a time for problem-solving.

Far-left zealots want to destroy America so they can rebuild it as a socialistic paradise, a hyper-Sweden. Those people are dangerous, and we will watch them closely.

And yes, even the criminal Karl Rove, and ex-Bushie brain of Bush who should be held in contempt by Congress is still a columnist on Wall Street Journal, does speaking engagements on wingnut Faux News, and even has his own website. Click here.